We Chews the News

Mr. Tum turned over in bed.
Mr. Tum sighed, and he said,
“Argh.”

Mr. Tum was waking up.
The sun shone on Mr. Tum’s head
As he tossed and he turned in his bed.
Morning had passed,
And noon was coming soon.

Noon meant food for the stomach,
And the stomach meant to have that food.
Mr. Tum had very little to say about it,
For get up he would.
His tossing and turning meant
That he was beginning to suspect his fate.

Poor Mr. Tum.
No control, Mr. Tum?
Think of the joy, Mr. Tum.
No worry, Mr. Tum.
The world is a happy place.
A happy place and a safe place, Mr. Tum.
Your eyelids twitched, Mr. Tum.
You’re losing the battle, Mr. Tum.

A baby-blue eye looked out at the world.
It saw
The sun.
It saw nothing but the sun!
It closed quickly.
Wrinkles spoke of pain for Mr. Tum.

Turn your head, Mr. Tum.
Mr. Tum turned his head.
Covers flew over that head.
Now he was hidden from the world.
And the sun.
But not from his stomach.

It growled.
The covers slipped down from his head.
Two blank, blue eyes looked up from the bed.
Who’s the boss, Mr. Tum?
Mr. Tum said, “God
Damn!”
His stomach mumbled something.
It must have had a wicked sting,
For Mr. Tum got up.

Two great big feet hit the floor.
Two soft, but vicious, curses hit the air.
The air trembled.
So did Mr. Tum.
His stomach was speaking again.

To the kitchen, Mr. Tum!
Obey your master, Mr. Tum!

And that is what he did. He dialed ham
And he dialed eggs.
He dialed coffee
And he dialed cream.
He dialed toast with lots and lots of butter.

It came at once.
And Mr. Tum could hear his stomach slaver in anticipation.
“But wait awhile!” said his smile, “We’ve yet to hear the news.”

He turned another dial.
His radio responded with warmth
as its lights lit up.
Words were seen.
They said, “Good News.”
Mr. Tum turned to it.

He never turned the dial to “Bad News.”
He wouldn’t even turn it to “Mixed News.”
After all, why should he?
It wasn’t any of it true.
It was based on fact – sometimes.
But no one ever knew.
It gave a person what he wanted to hear.
A little sorrow,
A little cheer.

“How wonderful,” thought Mr. Tum.
No greater idea ever was or ever will be.”
Maybe so, Mr. Tum.
But, Mr. Tum,
Let’s wait and see.